one on one

it's a big part of what i do (though i have to be reminded it's not my only responsibility).

i have the priviledge, joy, sorrow, annoyance, etc. of meeting with college girls who are trying to figure out what it means to live their life in this world. they have problems with roommates, boyfriends, sorority sisters, parents, teachers, friends, really with anyone who has a pulse. and that's only where it starts.

what am i to do as i listen to these girls? they really don't want to know what i think or what advice i have for them. they don't want to hear how i can identify with them or how i've been there too. they don't really even want me to cry with them.

they want to be known.

and most of the time, they don't even know it. they are unaware of this deep yearning inside to be known. and i've been there, too. i know what it means to feel like no one around knows me...they may know things about me, but they fail to know me, really know me. yet this is normal. this is the longing of our hearts, this is our humanity. we were created to be in relationship--in community--and so this deep yearning makes perfect sense. but they also don't know that they're trying to fill this through relationships with their boyfriends; through their intensely busy schedule; through their academic work; through their social activities; through their identity as being in greek life, the honors college, a pre-med major, an athlete, a non-conformist, a super-christian; through their desire to escape from their thoughts that tell them they're just not good enough.

they hear but don't believe that Jesus knows them. He knows her name. He knows her desires. He knows her struggles. He knows her sin. He knows her ambitions. He knows her fears. He knows her pain. He knows her laugh. He knows her tears. He knows her disappointments. He knows her joys. He knows her doubts. He knows her deepest secrets. He knows her idols. He knows her gods. He knows her.

what a comfort. scary, though it may be, that Jesus actually knows me and these girls i'm just trying to love on.

so what do i actually do when i meet with these girls? i try to point her back to the only One who can put her together again. i'm pointing her back to reality, to the One who created her and knows her. trying to get her to quit looking at herself and to behold her Savior. He is her only hope. and He fills her every longing.

that's why i'm here.